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Thursday, 30 April 2009

It's just WRONG!

JD - Look at this. Just - LOOK - at - this!!

Max - It's not right!

JD - It's very, very, WRONG!

[Comment from female human - it IS a shame that all dogs are banned from our beaches during the summer, just because a few people don't look after their pets it now means that we all have to go without. They're really going to miss it - that's why we took them there last weekend, so they could have one last, long enjoyable romp before the 5 month ban kicks in.]

Tuesday, 28 April 2009

JD's guide to choosing a good toy....

JD - Hi - I'm JD. And I'd like to talk to you about something important....

(....he he he - sorry Max - but I did like your credit crunch introduction so I thought I'd do the same!)

A good doggie toy is a vital necessity for any self-respecting
hound. It needs to be fun to play with yet sturdy enough to take a certain level of punishment. It needs to feel good so that it's tactile and fun to hold in your mouth. It needs to be something that you can enjoy running around with. And - in our case - it needs to be something that your brother can also enjoy.

Take our latest toy for example. It's a rubber flying ring for us to play with when we're out at the park.

It looks simple enough - it is! But is it fun to play with? Now let's see - it's certainly robust, it feels good in my mouth and I had a good romp with it this mornin
g so I know it's good to run with. Now, the only thing I have left to test is - does my brother like it?

JD - Now let me see - how do you throw this thing.....?

Max - Hey!

JD - Ohh, PERFECT shot, even if I DO say so myself, he he he!!

Max - Get this thing OFF me!!

JD - ....and there you have it! Another toy that has passed my in-depth quality control testing. Now, please excuse me, I need to start assessing this bone toy....

JD - *He he he! S'no good, can't continue - too busy laughing at Max - he he he!*

Sunday, 26 April 2009

A perfect Sunday

JD - The weather has been spectacular today.

Max - We love it when it doesn't rain - we don't like being soggy doggies!

JD - But not only has it not rained it has been really warm. So we've been out and about and we've been having SO much fun!

Max - We went to the beach earlier....

JD - ....and I found a really good stick to chew....

Max - ....it DID look like a rather good stick. Um, JD, what's that behind you....?

JD - Eh? Where?

Max - He he - got it! *Chew! Chew!*

JD - We met our bestest friend - this is Yoshi, he's a really handsome yellow lab and he loves playing zoomies with us!

Max - I love Yoshi - I shadow him whenever we meet up, as you can see from the photo!

JD - This is a cool photo - it helps to show how tall we are for Schnauzers. Someone even asked my human if I was a standard Schnauzer today - I love being tall!

Max - Sadly we couldn't stay and play with Yoshi all day. Eventually we had to go back home so we went out to play in the garden.

JD - Our female human is really keen for us to try agility training at some point soon, so she's set up a very basic home-made course for us - in this picture you can see me checking the height of one of the jumps.

Max - We enjoy agility training - we hear we've got a doggie see-saw and a tunnel on order too!

JD - Our humans also set up a very large drinking bowl for us! They filled it with shallow splash of water and we had great fun jumping in and out!

Max - Whilst we were playing with our new drinking bowl our humans mowed the lawn. When they'd finished we checked their work to make sure it was up to scratch....

JD - Hey, humans, you missed a bit over here!

Max - I had a quick practise at surveillance - what do you think of my discreet stance? I like to lie low in the grass and pretend I'm completely invisible!!

JD - It's been such a fun day - I love it when our humans spend the entire day with us!

Max - Me too. I'm a bit tired now though. A snooze would be rather nice right now....

JD - Hmmm? Whassat Max? Zzzzzzz.......!

Saturday, 25 April 2009

Max's guide to the credit crunch

Hi - I'm Max. And I'd like to talk to you about something important.....

....namely, this credit munch thingy that we've all been hearing so much about. Apparently it's a worry. It's the hot topic of debate amongst humans. We've all heard them going on about it - "When will it end?" - "What can we do about it?" - "How will we cope?" Well, because it could possibly influence the supply of doggie biscuits that we get I've done some serious thinking on this subject. And I'm pleased to tell you that I have devised a fail-safe way of making it through these hard times.

Now, we realise that humans are always worrying about how they're going to acquire things. Food, petrol, real estate - they like to own things, to make things theirs. So during these tough times I feel that we need to go back to our roots, to uphold that proud canine tradition - "you pee - you own!"

Take me and JD for example - we are now doggies of considerable wealth. Our real-estate boundaries stretch far and wide, and I'm not just talking about the detached summer house that we have had sited within our humans garden either....

....I'm talking serious real estate. I have utilised this ancient 'you pee - you own!' tradition many times and I now own an impressive range of beach huts. At my last count at least 50 of these cute beach-side settings are now mine....

By the same process I have also staked my claim on several businesses. The Royal Mail I though seemed as good a place as any to start my business empire- it is now mine!

Of course, to uphold this proud canine tradition you need to realise that boundaries are important. We can't all just pee willy-nilly! You need to sniff out your boundaries and ensure that other doggies have not already applied for planning permission or any form of consent before you. Walk the areas you are interested in many times before you stake your claim. For example, the edge of our domain starts here, at this rather pretty tree on the seafront....

....and ends about 3 miles later at this rather convenient post!

These boundaries are always honoured amongst doggies - the owner of the seafront from this post onwards is one of our best friends, a lovely yellow lab called Yoshi. He staked his claim several months ago so now this land belongs to him , it's as simple as that! So, our land boundaries stretch along the seafront from here....

....right up to the pier at the other end of the seafront!

Further, the beauty of this ancient 'you pee - you own!' law is that you can also use it to pick out any bits and bobs that might take your fancy whilst you're out on your walk. For example, we decided that this wheelie bin that's situated just before one of the entrances to the beach would be a lovely little gift for our humans. It's a very convenient poo-bag depositing receptacle you see - you see what thoughtful pups we are?! [Message from female human - gee, thanks Max, you really SHOULDN'T have....!]

We also own a few cars too - I rather liked this dark grey sporty number so applied the pee method, now it's mine!

....whilst JD preferred this lighter grey car.

So, there you have it - the ancient 'you pee - you own!' rule. I think you'll find that it's the secret to getting through the credit munch. Please feel free to use it - you'll thank me later!!

Friday, 24 April 2009

Brought to you by the letter M....

JD - As a tribute to the wonderful 'Splorin' Wolfies....

Max - ....our blog today is an homage to one of their previous posts!

JD - "For those of you who remember Sesame Street!" - he he he!

Max - We hope they don't mind us shamelessly borrowing (stealing!) their idea....

JD - ....we were simply inspired by them during our daily carrot munch - thanks wolfies!

Thursday, 23 April 2009

For the very latest in sylish footwear....

....grab yourself a pair of cosy Schnauzer slippers!!

Max and JD in one of their favourite sleeping spots, a-foot a-piece!

JD and Max - Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz........!!!!

Tuesday, 21 April 2009

Our friends - part 1

JD - Because we're both so wonderful....

Max - ....not to mention incredibly handsome....

JD - ....we find that everyone wants to be our friends!

Max - When we're out on our morning constitutionals we often meet up with Billy and Bobby....

Early morning terrier melee!

JD - ....they're a couple of Yorkshire Terrier brothers. They're nine years old and they're great fun!

Max - They're quite tall for Yorkies - almost as tall as us! We're quite alike. Bobby is soppy and friendly with EVERYONE, just like JD....

JD whispers a juicy secret in Bobby's ear!

JD - ....and Billy is a little more reserved and has nominated himself as the guard-dog out of the two of them, just like Max!

Max and Billy check the coast is clear before continuing with their morning walkies!

Max - We love it when the four of us share our morning walk.

JD - Then there's Otto - he's really cool!

JD says hello to Otto!

Max - We like it when he comes round. He even came to visit us last Friday when we were feeling a bit sad and sorry for ourselves after our op and he perked us up no end!

JD - He's a miniature Daschund - he's one year old and is extremely independent.

Otto has a good bottom sniff!

Max - He was rehoused recently and he often goes to work with his new owner.

JD - He's a bit wary of humans (sensible doggie!) but is fine with dogs. He enjoys nosing around our toys and our bed and our cushions....

Max - ....we think he's great and we follow him around whenever he's here.

JD and Max circle Otto to make sure they don't miss any of his cool moves!
(Max - I love this photo as hey, I know I've had THE op but what do you think of my new MASSIVE crystal ball - he he he!)

JD - That's it for part 1 - our humans have not been organised enough to take photos of ALL our friends yet....

Max - ....stoopid humans, he he he!

JD - ....so 'our friends - part 2' will be coming to a blog near you very soon

Max - Yup! There's Yoshi, and Caddie and Mollie and Jetty....

JD - ....as we said we're incredibly popular - ha!

Monday, 20 April 2009

An Award - woweee!!

JD - Hi everyone - we're everso excited!

Max - Because we've been awarded the "Paw"some Blog award by our lovely blog friend Nala...

JD - To be nominated for this award by such a great blogger makes us feel extremely proud!

Max - I know, I've been telling EVERYONE all about it today, I can't keep it to myself! [Note from female human - Max HAS been particularly woofy today, now I know why....!]

JD - This award is presented to those dog bloggers out there who know the meaning of GREATNESS. Their blogs are consistently interesting, funny, or informative. Their KINDNESS is extended to others without expectation of it's return, and their FRIENDSHIP inspires others to do EXTRAORDINARY things. These are the blogs you can't wait to read everyday. In short, they are AWE-INSPIRING, full of wonder, and simply PAWsome!

Max - You see now WHY I'm so excited about this?!!

JD - Exactly!! To accept this award you must paw it forward to at least 4 others who you feel exemplify a "Paw"some Blog, and leave a note saying why you think they deserve the Pawsome Award!

Max - So - in no particular order - our nominations are....

Sasha - we love your blog! You are the prettiest Schnauzer we have ever seen and we think your writing style is absolutely superb, it is original and incredibly funny, you always have our humans in stitches (which, after being in stitches ourselves after our op, we feel is only right and just!) We always eagerly await your blog updates and simply can not get enough of Pup-alicious! (PS - we apologise if we're inundating you with awards but as you know we're both hopelessly in love with you and simply want to know all there is to know about you!!)

The Daily Oskar
Oskar - wise and brave Oskar, he really is a cool Schnauzer who can always be guaranteed to make us giggle. He is wise and handsome beyond words and his Mom type person is a very skilled photographer. To read Oskar's blog is a sheer delight and one that should be shared with as many people as possible!

The 'Splorin' Wolfies
Two gentle giants, Saige and Guinness, their posts truly are a joy to behold. Few words and incredible pictures make for one unbelievably impressive blog that will have you (just like us) wishing and hoping for daily updates!

The Schnauzer Blog
Fatty, Stephy and Ally share the writing credits for this fun blog - they NEVER argue about who's going to write the next blog or who is the cutest.......he he he! These three have to be some of the happiest doggies we've EVER seen, the photos really are great and they share their Malaysian lifestyles in a very exciting fashion with all their readers. We wish we could visit them in the fur!

Eduardo The Snuggle Puggle

Possibly one of THE cutest doggies we have EVER seen! His blog is really sweet - one visit and you will be completely in love! And this is evidenced by the HUGE amount of awards that he has already been presented with - so here's another very well deserved one winging its way over to you Eduardo!

Both - Thanks Nala - you're the best!!

Sunday, 19 April 2009


JD - We've been working hard on our sad faces over the past few days....

Max - ....and we're obviously becoming quite accomplished!

JD - Because today when we aimed our sad faces at our humans
they removed our collars and served us elevenses!

Max - It was incredibly scrummy! It was a snack we've never had before, it's called natural yoghurt.

JD - I want it again!

Max - Me too! I didn't even mind when our humans wiped off our beards.

JD - I gave them a helping paw with that job. Well, I wanted to make sure there was absolutely NO yoghurt left - he he he!

Saturday, 18 April 2009

A stitch in time....

JD - My stitches are bit itchy!

Max - Mine too - have a nibble on them, it really feels good!

JD - Okay!

Both - *Nibble! Nibble!*

JD - Hey, hey.....what's going on.....hey humans, get your hands off us!

Max - Help! Help! We're being 'collared'!

JD - Humph!

Max - Humph!

JD - I'm not talking to our humans any more....

Max - ....me neither!

Both - HUMPH!