To the unobservant pup it would have appeared to be a day like any other, but from the moment I put my nose outside the door on my way to carry out my morning ablutions I knew that this day was going to be slightly different. There was something in the air - the promise of a secret yet to be unfurled. As I watched my brother sniff excitedly around the garden - no doubt checking to see if the neighbours' cats had partied here the night before - I knew that this 'something' had eluded him. But to me - the great Sherlock Schnauzer! - this 'something' was as clear as if it had been neatly packaged and placed in front of my very woozle!
Myself and my brother ate a hearty breakfast and then settled down for a morning chat with Olly Octopus and Squeaky Chicken whilst FH busied herself with one of her usual morning rituals - emptying the dishwasher, emptying the washing machine, doing some ironing - to my mind humans are very talented at filling their time with very tedious pass times! After what felt like an age FH finally straightened up and announced it was time for our morning constitutional - at last! We went to the nature reserve and spent a very happy hour romping in the fields and running along the beach - we met up with our great friends Molly the Doberman and her 'big' sister Tammy the Yorkie and all of us had a wonderful game of zoomies before we finally arrived back home slightly damp, very sandy, delightfully tired and extremely happy!
Sadly, FH had to leave almost immediately upon our return to go to work but I admit I hardly noticed her depart as I was filled with intrigue about what the day would bring. I knew that something exciting was very, very close, so as my dopey brother settled himself down for a snooze on MH's foot with a contented sigh I couldn't help but observe him with a touch of pity. It must be a shame, I thought, not to know when something BIG was just around the corner. It was as I was walking away from him - sadly shaking my head - to carry out a garden perimeter check, that it happened....
There was the tread of a familiar footstep on our garden path, the sound of our front porch being opened and the ring of our doorbell - then the hurried sound of our postman putting our post down before they bid a hasty retreat, no doubt scared away by my butch and manly schnauzer barking as I ran through our house raising the alarm by shouting 'Mail alert! Mail alert! Step AWAY from the door Mr Postman, we have you covered!" As I was running through the house I noticed that my brother hadn't even moved from his recumbent position on the floor - sigh....!
MH collected the mail - the usual selection of envelopes, plus a box - THE box! I knew that this was what I had been waiting for. My very puppy being yearned for MH to open it - after all it was addressed to 'Mr Jones' so why wasn't he ripping it apart to discover the wonders that waited within?! But he resisted - he put it on the side and wandered off back to his laptop, inserting his foot under my brother as he sat down as he knows how much JD loves to snuggle on people's feet - can you believe that my brother was STILL slumped on the floor? It's a good job the postman hadn't been a genuine security threat!
Myself and my brother had a very full day of snoozing in various locations around the house, playing with Olly in the front room, snaffling a light lunch of plain yogurt with a drizzle of local honey (to help a certain brother with his tiresome allergies to pollen!), playing hide and seek around the garden sheds and waiting for FH to return home. Of course, I ensured that regular perimeter checks were carried out throughout the day. Finally, FH remembered that she had a husband and two cute puppies waiting for her and deigned to come home. I greeted her as if we'd been apart for months whilst my brother sat quietly to the side waiting his turn to greet her.
When all the 'welcome home' dances and cuddles were over FH noticed the box - THE box! - and asked MH why he hadn't opened it as it had 'Mr Jones' on it. He commented that it had come from Dogs Trust and as he hadn't ordered anything from Dogs Trust he thought maybe it had been a typo and the box was meant for FH. She said that she hadn't ordered anything either so opened it to see what was inside.
And what a wonderful treasure that box held, just as I knew it would! From within its depths FH pulled out the most amazing pelican stuffie - oh gosh it was wonderful! A large beak that had a squeaker in it just asking to be pressed by a nose! A cute head that had a bell in it that tinkled in the most provocative of ways for a puppy! Rope legs that were just asking to be chewed! And a contraption in its tummy that made the most delightful 'gurgling' noises whenever it was moved. Oooh, I wanted it, I wanted it, I WANTED IT! But did FH pass this wonderful toy onto myself or my brother? She did not! Instead she searched through the box, found no note or message, so she put the pelican on the sideboard and told us we were not allowed to have it until she had found out where it had come from. Nooooooooo!!!!!!!
"But why can't we have the stuffie?" asked my brother forlornly, who - let's face it - is usually a little behind in the proceedings.
"Because the humans are too slow to figure out where it's come from!" I exclaimed! "But it will take me less than 5 minutes to figure out who sent it! A-ha dear brother - the game is a-paw!"
"Eh?!" said JD.
"Well," I continued, "we have a great mystery here in front of us. And when solving a problem of this sort, the grand thing is to be able to reason backwards!"
"You-what?!" continued my somewhat slow brother.
"Let us examine the facts!" I ploughed on, hoping that my brother would eventually catch up. "How often have I said to you that when you have eliminated the impossible, whatever remains, however improbable, must be the truth?!"
"Um - never?" stuttered my brother looking totally confused.
"Yes, well - that's as maybe!" I stated boldly, "but we need to figure out where this amazing stuffie has come from otherwise we will not get to play with it and that, dear brother, simply can not be!"
"Oh, I'm with you there!" said JD, finally cottoning on. "So Max, who do you think sent this delightful gift to us?"
I paced up and down in front of the stuffie. "Let us lay out the facts as we know them!" I said. "The stuffie has come through the post - that eliminates all the pups and kitties we know first-paw! We know that the pups and kitties that we know first-paw would simply leave a gift in our porch, they would not use the postal service!"
My brother looked suitably impressed so I continued. "The parcel in question has come come from Dogs Trust - it has come from somepup who obviously wants to help doggies in need."
"Well, doesn't that cover ALL our pals?" interrupted JD, somewhat annoyingly. I stopped my pacing and glared at him.
"You SEE yet you do not OBSERVE dear brother!" I exclaimed. "The distinction is clear! I know that all our pals are kind and generous - that is not in dispute! What the contents of this parcel tells us is that the sender is thoughtful through and through - observe!" I snapped, as I turned to face the pelican. "The stuffie in question is quite large and we are a breed of limited stature."
"Hey, now come on....!" my misguided brother - who likes to think he is the size of a wolfie - started to grumble, so I silenced him with a glare!
"Enough! The size of the pelican is, of course, a trifle. But there is nothing as important as trifles! If the stuffie is large and we are small then it goes without saying that this toy was selected by some pup who knew we would enjoy playing with it together. They bought us a toy big enough for two! The pup in question appreciates the enjoyment a shared toy can bring, with the dual chasing and the dual tugging! I conclude therefore that the pelican came not just from one pup but from TWO!"
My brother remained impressively speechless so I continued....
"So! The pelican was sent from an overseas pal, from two pups not just one, and most probably from somepup who is themselves a rescue which is why they appreciate the good work that Dogs Trust is doing! I conclude that this spectacular pelican was sent by somepup who recently used Dogs Trust, probably to make a donation, which is how they became aware of this most amazing stuffie in the first place."
I could see that my brother was impressed.
"Wow!" he said, "I'm impressed!"
I was pleased at this turn of events so let him continue. "So, um, who exactly sent the pelican then?"
This was the moment I had been waiting for - I puffed up my chest, I lifted my head as high as it would go, I cleared my throat and I announced, "It's elementary my dear JD! This stuffie came from fun Booker and sweet Asa! Let's look at the facts." I had started pacing again, the better to help me explain my reasoning. "Booker and Asa live across the pond. Asa is a rescue doggie. She has a brother who knows how much fun it is to have a sibling to play with. We played paw-it-forward with them recently and they kindly donated some money to Dogs Trust. I conclude that it is more than possible, it is in fact probable that this stuffie came from them!" I stopped dramatically (as my brother can confirm that I can never resist a touch of the dramatic!) and turned to face my brother.
"I have heard your reasons and regard them as convincing and adequate!" he proclaimed excitedly! "Let the stuffie be freed to our clutches and let the playing commence!"
And that, dear readers, is how I,
It is, it's TRUE!!
Oh - and before we leave today please DO read our thank you post here for everyone who was part of Shelby's Auction - which is basically ALL of you!!
(Note from FH - thanks everso much to Booker and Asa for sending such a wonderful gift to the boys. If I had let my boys try to figure out who had sent it they probably would have managed it much quicker than me, we're sorry we had the stuffie for so long before you had to actually tell us it had come from you! They absolutely love it - JD especially has a penchant for rope toys so he usually chews the legs whilst Max is busy pressing the beak - he loves squeakers! They run up and down the lounge with it and they absolutely love it! You are wonderful pals!)